Graduation advice from 10 greats

May has descended upon us. This means that, along with the budding trees, bushes and flowers, we can observe blossoming students, whose graduation caps are about to fly in the air. Soon, they will leave the life they have grown accustomed to and enter unfamiliar terrain, whatever it may be. If you suspect they could benefit from some sound guidance, you are right. Take a look at the following words of wisdom – if you like what’s behind them, feel free to present the article to your graduate along with the meaningful gift you’ve chosen.

Jerry Zucker, film director, University of Wisconsin, 2003

“It doesn’t matter that your dream came true if you spent your whole life sleeping. So get out there and go for it, but don’t be caught waiting. It’s great to plan for your future. Just don’t live there, because really nothing ever happens in the future. Whatever happens happens now, so live your life where the action is – now.”

Aaron Sorkin, screenwriter, Syracuse University, 2012

“You’ll meet a lot of people who, to put it simply, don’t know what they’re talking about. Develop your own compass and trust it. Take risks, dare to fail, remember the first person through the wall always gets hurt.”

Neil Gaiman, writer, The University of the Arts, 2012

“Make new mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work, or family or life. Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever.”

Bobbi Brown, makeup artist  and brand founder, Fashion Institute of Technology, 2014

“Work hard but work smart. Always. Every day. Nothing is handed to you, and nothing is easy. You’re not owed anything. No job or task is too small or beneath you. If you want to get ahead, volunteer to do the things no one else wants to do, and do it better. Be a sponge. Be open and learn.”

Gloria Steinem, political activist, Smith College, 2007

“My generation often accepted the idea that the private/public roles of women and men were ‘natural.’ Your generation has made giant strides into public life, but often still says: How can I combine career and family? I say to you from the bottom of my heart that when you ask that question you are setting your sights way too low. First of all, there can be no answer until men are asking the same question. Second, every other modern democracy in the world is way, way ahead of this country in providing a national system of childcare and job patterns adapted to the needs of parents, both men and women. So don’t get guilty. Get mad. Get active. If this is a problem that affects millions of unique women, then the only answer is to organize.”

Madeleine K. Albright, politician and diplomat, Wellesley College, 2007

“It’s possible that we are all so busy using time-saving devices that we don’t have time to do anything meaningful. Or we might have the right intentions, but instead of acting, we decide to wait – until we are out of school, until we can afford a down payment on a home, until we can finance college for our own children or until we can free up time in retirement. We keep waiting until we run out of ‘untils.’ Then it is too late.”

Nora Ephron, writer and director, Wellesley College, 1996

“Whatever you choose, however many roads you travel, I hope that you choose not to be a lady. I hope you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there. And I also hope that you will choose to make some of that trouble on behalf of women.”

Debbie Millman, writer and artist, San Jose State University, 2013

“I recommend the following course of action for those who are just beginning their careers, or for those like me, who may be reconfiguring midway through: If you imagine less, less will undoubtedly be what you deserve. Do what you love, and don’t stop until you get what you love. Work as hard as you can, imagine immensities, don’t compromise and don’t waste time. Start now. Not 20 years from now, not two weeks from now. Now.”

Judith Butler, philosopher and gender theorist, McGill University, 2013

“We have to continue to shake off what we sometimes think we know in order to lend our imaginations to vibrant and sometimes agonistic spectrums of experience.”

Joseph Brodsky, poet  and essayist, University of Michigan, 1988

“Now and in the time to be, I think it will pay for you to zero in on being precise with your language… The purpose is to enable you to articulate yourselves as fully and precisely as possible; in a word, the purpose is your balance. For the accumulation of things not spelled out, not properly articulated, may result in neurosis. …

Try to be kind to your parents… Try not to rebel against them, for, in all likelihood, they will die before you do, so you can spare yourselves at least this source of guilt if not of grief. …

Try not to set too much store by politicians – not so much because they are dumb or dishonest, which is more often than not the case, but because of the size of their job, which is too big even for the best among them, by this or that political party, doctrine, system or a blueprint thereof. All they or those can do, at best, is to diminish a social evil, not eradicate it. …

Try not to stand out, try to be modest. There are too many of us as it is, and there are going to be many more, very soon. Thus climbing into the limelight is bound to be one at the expense of the others who won’t be climbing. That you must step on somebody’s toes doesn’t mean you should stand on their shoulders. …

Try to avoid granting yourself the status of the victim. Of all the parts of your body, be most vigilant over your index finger, for it is blame-thirsty. A pointed finger is a victim’s logo – the opposite of the V-sign and a synonym for surrender. No matter how abominable your condition may be, try not to blame anything or anybody…

Try not to pay attention to those who will try to make life miserable for you. There will be a lot of those – in the official capacity as well as the self-appointed. Suffer them if you can’t escape them, but once you have steered clear of them, give them the shortest shrift possible. Above all, try to avoid telling stories about the unjust treatment you received at their hands; avoid it no matter how receptive your audience may be. …

IRINA MISSIURO is a writer and editorial consultant for The Jewish Voice.