Judith Frank on ‘All I Love and Know’

Women’s Alliance celebration features award-winning author

Judith FrankI had the pleasure of receiving a copy of “All I Love And Know” in advance of its release in July. I curled up with that book and, it might sound cliché, but I could not put it down. When Lezli Pious asked if I would co-chair the Women’s Alliance Campaign Celebration with her, I glanced at my copy of “All I Love And Know” and agreed to co-chair, hoping that this book would be considered. Happily it was chosen, and I am thrilled it is finding its way to our community of readers.

The book tells the tale of how, upon the sudden death of Daniel’s brother and sister-in-law in the bombing of an Israeli cafe, Daniel and his partner Matt are tasked with rearing the couple’s two young children. While trying to do the honorable thing, this instantly built nuclear family hits a host of issues: two sets of less-than-thrilled grandparents, the Israeli government and the grieving process itself.

Judith Frank holds a B.A. from the Hebrew University, and an M.F.A. and Ph.D. from Cornell University. She is the author of “Crybaby Butch,” which was awarded a Lambda Literary Award in 2004. In 2008, she received a National Endowment for the Arts fellowship for “All I Love and Know.” She has been a resident at Yaddo and the MacDowell Colony, and has published short fiction in The Massachusetts Review, other voices, and Best Lesbian Love Stories 2005. She teaches English and creative writing at Amherst College, and lives with her partner and two children in Amherst, Massachusetts. 

Robin: “All I Love And Know” has been out for three months. How have you found the reaction to be? Is there anything surprising or particularly pleasing about the response?

Judith: Many people have told me how moved they were by it, and a writer never tires of that! I’ve been a little surprised by the warm response from Jewish publications and audiences; I’d expected that a novel as critical of Israel as this one is would get some scathing reviews. But even where reviewers are critical, of either the portrayal of the Israel/Palestine conflict or the portrayal of gay life, they’ve been conscientious about separating out their personal feelings from their assessment of the novel. I find that very classy and touching.

Robin: What was the nugget that sparked the story?

Judith: The terrorist attack, the death of a twin brother: that’s what got me going.

Robin: What was one of your favorite parts of the story to write? One of the most difficult?

Judith: I loved writing from Matt’s point of view, because he just lets all those feelings we usually censor – feelings that our partner’s troubles will impinge on our lives, for example – flow (and is promptly ashamed by them). The hardest thing to write was Daniel’s grief. I wanted him to grieve throughout the novel, because that’s what would really happen. I wanted to go deep into that grief, and show how it can harm and change a person – I felt I needed to represent that human experience –

but I also wanted readers to stay with Daniel, to care about him and to root for his and Matt’s relationship.

Robin: Given your background, how do you distinguish your views from those of your characters?

Judith: My characters represent a range of views. But even where their views are similar to mine, as in the case of Daniel and Matt, the ways those  views intertwine around their emotions are different. Daniel and Matt have almost the exact same politics – but they still fight about them, because they’re coming from different life experiences and subject positions.

Robin: You cover a multitude of topics in “All I Love And Know.” What can your readers learn from reading about your perspectives on gay marriage, adoption and the Israeli/Palestinian conflict?

Judith: I’m not sure I think of my novel as teaching people things. I guess my hope is that they will empathically engage with characters who may be different than they are, and that that engagement will open them up a little.

Robin: I’ve heard you talk about the way in which the current events are shared in a novel can be reflected and digested through the arts. How does “All I Love And Know” give a sense of perspective about what’s happening in the Middle East?

Judith: In two ways, I think. First, it expresses the ambivalence that increasing numbers of American Jews are grappling with in their relation to Israel. Second, it seeks to bring forward elements of Palestinian experience that we don’t see represented in the press.

Robin: Are you able to read other works of fiction while working on your own?

Judith: I am. But I can’t read book reviews: the language of judgment is crippling when I’m trying to write.

I’ve heard it’s nearly impossible to get into one of Judy’s courses at Amherst College, so don’t get shut out from this fabulous event!

EDITOR’S NOTE: Judith Frank will be speaking at the Women’s Alliance Fall Campaign Celebration on Nov. 6 at 7 p.m. at Ledgemont Country Club. For more information about this event or to RSVP, contact Danielle Germanowski at dgermanowski@jewishallianceri.org.

ROBIN KALL HOMONOFF is Rhode Island’s own book maven. From author interviews to events with best-selling authors, Robin shares her love of books wherever and whenever possible. Connect with her on Facebook.com/readingwithrobin and follow her on Twitter @robinkall and online at www.readingwithrobin.com.