Temple to honor friends who have cooked minyan breakfast for decades

CRANSTON – If you were to look at a seed without knowing it could eventually blossom into a flower, tree or another type of beautiful plant, you would probably pass it by without a second thought. Why pay attention to something so small?

This example of the value of small things was among those brought up during a discussion of the Torah portion on March 26 at Temple Sinai’s weekly minyan breakfast.

Some might say that these breakfasts, organized every week for more than 30 years by Stanley Horovitz and Donald Wexler, are another example of something that started small and became beautiful. The breakfasts have become a staple of Shabbat services at Temple Sinai where 20 or so members gather every Saturday morning for coffee, orange juice, bagels, challah, French toast, eggs and oatmeal. The oatmeal, says Horovitz, is the moneymaker (metaphorically speaking, since the breakfast is free).

“Ariel, you shouldn’t have this oatmeal,” Horovitz warned me with a smile. “You’ll never be able to have anyone else’s!”

When I asked for the recipe, he laughed, and said he couldn’t give it to me because he had no idea what he was doing.

The breakfasts were originally the idea of a former Sinai rabbi, Jerome Gurland, and were first run by Nate Sandler. When Sandler moved away in the early 1980s, the reins were passed to Horovitz, Wexler and another member, Sonny Jaffa. While Jaffa has since died, his wife still attends breakfast every week.

“We’ve been insulting each other for more than 40 years,” said Wexler with a smile. Later, he explained, “We kid each other, we insult each other, but actually we’re very, very close.”

Horovitz and Wexler mentioned that in the early days of these breakfasts, they used to drive around the community and pick up people who couldn’t otherwise get to the minyan. While the whole idea of breakfast started with the intent to attract the 10 people needed for a minyan, it was quickly clear that it had another benefit.

“It helped us to get a minyan, but it also got some of the seniors out,” explained Horovitz. 

“Definitely,” agreed Wexler. “It was something to look forward to for the elderly people, like Stan,” said the 88-year-old to his 82-year-old friend.

Those who came to breakfast, including Rabbi Jeffrey Goldwasser and Cantor Wendy Siegel, were welcoming and helpful. The congregants each played a part in preparing breakfast, and once it was ready, attendees laughed and joked and caught up with each other over a good meal. 

Wexler introduced himself to me as “Monkey,” with a smile, and one congregant complimentarily compared another to Mae West, to which she responded: “Are you calling me fat?!” Hands on her hips and smiling, she immediately started laughing after her question. The environment was merry, and anyone could see that this is a weekly gathering that is much enjoyed.

After breakfast, attendees sing a joyous “Birkat Hamazon” and discussed the meaning of the weekly Torah portion before participating in Shabbat services. This week’s Torah portion examined deshen – an acronym for the Hebrew words davar shelo nechshav – or, in other words, the importance of treating small things as holy.

In a time when everybody is so busy that they forget to stop and smell the flowers, so to speak, the connection between the lesson from the Torah portion and the value in the kind of work Horovitz and Wexler do became very clear.

As a thank you for providing a forum for community socializing and Judaic engagement, and for their dedication and contribution to the community, congregants will honor Horovitz and Wexler with a luncheon on April 10. While the luncheon is for the two men, they made sure to note that they could not prepare the breakfasts alone. They said repeatedly that “the girls” - a few female congregants who regularly help the duo - also make the breakfasts a success. 

“It’s not just the two of us anymore,” said Horovitz. “It’s Herb [Katz], it’s the girls – they do all the shopping. They know what we need. Joan [Goralnik] picks up the baked goods so they’re fresh every morning.” Lois Cohen and Sherry Feldman are also regular helpers, he said.

“They’re the untold heroes, really,” agrees Wexler.

Usually, Wexler said, congregants come together only for special services. But the breakfasts are an exception. 

“It’s the only function in the temple that regularly brings people together,” he said. “I’d like to think that just the fact that we have this function every week … it brings people together and makes people stronger. If they’re coming, it’s worth it. What I’ve learned and the friends I’ve made - it’s been an opportunity.”

It seems that the congregants of Temple Sinai are doing a wonderful job of deshen with their recognition. Sometimes it is the small things - whether it’s putting on a weekly community breakfast or otherwise - that are the most holy.

ARIEL BROTHMAN is a freelance writer who lives in Wrentham, Massachusetts.